Day 120 - "32 and Counting" or "Thanks Mom"

So I take a moment to reflect...

I was told by my mom about the trials and tribulations she faced when she found out she was pregnant with me. Being 16 at the time had enough complications but she was also suffering from Lupus. Doctors told her that she had a 50% chance to live through the birth and I had 0%.

Anyone guess now why I love the phrase "Never Tell Me The Odds!" And all along you thought it was because it was said in Star Wars! Well... maybe that has a lot to do with it but it has more meaning than that.

I'm not trying to toss my mom under the spotlight for the accident that I am. I have to say thanks to her for having me against all odds. She faced some hard choices and went for it. I only hope that I can fill the shoes she has left me. (No high heel jokes either guys!!!)

This last year of my life has definitely been the hardest I have had yet. There has been a lot of hard choices that I have had to make. I am still waiting to see the outcome of those choices.

Who would have guessed that I would be in Iraq? Granted, you could say that about Florida, Alaska, etc. etc. I am adding Australia to the list soon. For a redneck from Oklahoma I don't mind to travel. That's probably my Grandad in me. He didn't settle down in one place till late in life. If it wasn't for the wife, who knows where I would be.

So I'll admit, part of me sits here and wonders what have I really accomplished. I know that some would say a lot. There are times when I feel like I haven't done anything at all. I guess it's safe to say that Christina isn't the only one hearing a biological clock.

The frat boys here call me old and are waiting to hold me down and boot me in the Ass in their twisted sense of tradition. I wouldn't say that I am in a big hurry to go hang out with them today. Granted they may be Marines but I am not afraid. With age comes wisdom or so they say. All I know is that I see how older people forget things.

It's weird the spot I am in. The future as always is wide open. What will I do next? I can honestly answer: "I don't know!" I have to wait a bit more to see the conclusion of this chapter. To say I want to be X when I grow up is strange at 32. Granted most that know me will say I will never grow up. My answer to that is that I will do my best to keep the kid at heart right where he is.

I will end my ramblings with this:

Don't let the odds scare you. The only people that beat the odds in life are the ones that went for it. The only odds I am sure of is that when you don't try its 100% against you. (I know Yoda would argue but he is in a Galaxy Far, Far, Away...)