Well, here I am. Today is the start of a new chapter of my life. When my wife dropped me off at the airport and drove away, I took the hardest step I will take during this adventure. The one that sends me to Iraq. The one that leaves behind my wife, cats, dog, family, friends, and gerbil. The same step that will clear the debts of my household. The very step that will give my wife the space she needs to figure out who she is and why we are together. The same step that sets me on a new path of self discovery.
Today a lot of people told me how brave I am and how proud they are. Last night when I was in a fetal position in bed I didn't feel very proud or brave. I won't lie to anyone. This scares me more than anything really has. Not because I am heading into a war torn country where I may get shot or blown up. I firmly believe when my time is up it wont matter where I am at. Only pray that your not flying with me as the pilot when my number is up. What scares me is that I am taking a chance. One that will either make or break my marriage.
Over the course of the next year I will delve more into whats going on in my head. I can't tell you whether its for your benefit or mine. Today is day ZERO of my One year term in Iraq. Amusingly it starts in Georgia. I will be here at Fort Benning for the next week and the ship out to Kuwait. From there I will head to whatever base they decide needs a techno geek like me.
Today I weigh 213 pounds. I am out of shape (I had to stop a lot to get my bags to the barracks,) My day was spent finishing cleaning out my office at home. Packing had to be finished so I could leave. The wife took me to the airport and held me so close. (It was great!) I took the Hardest Step I have ever taken. The one that moved me from the spot she left me at. Part of me wanted to have her swing back and get me. But alas, I didn't call and here I am. From there it was nothing more than a short flight, a few shuttle rides from Atlanta to Columbus to Fort Benning. I feel like I am back in Basic Training. If someone starts yelling while hitting a trash can to wake me up I will be back to 1995 yelling "Yes Drill Sergent!"
I am currently in a nice sized room with four bunks and matching wall lockers. Only two of us are here so there is some privacy thanks to the layout of the room. We shall see if it stays that way. I can hear the latrine and the washing machines. Sounds like I need to use earplugs tonight.
Today I was called by many friends and family. Thank you all for your support. Without all of you I would not be as strong as you give me credit for.
So here it is, my blog. Take it for what it is and will become. If you get bored, don't say I didn't warn you!
"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear."
- Nelson Mandela
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*SNOOOOOORE*
ReplyDeleteHuh, wha.....who???
Dude, I really doubt that this blog will ever get boring. We will all be living vicariously though your typed accounts of your adventure. Besides what better way for us to feel like we are there with you.
Oh, I tucked your minis in tonight and told them you miss them. The AT-AT's cried.
Kiana, Ivannia and Nemo all say hi. Stay safe.
Yeah definitely will be no boredom here. It'll be nice to stay connected. Post daily so I don't have to worry for days at a time, okay. :)
ReplyDeleteKaitlyn has declared that Pirates of the Caribbean are awful and It's a Small World is the place to be. *sigh* What am I going to do with this kid.
-Tammy